Friday, May 16, 2014

Sad

That's how I feel tonight. I really should feel happy since this week has actually brought lots of good news and my calendar for our FET, but right now I just feel sad and angry.
Infertility and the treatments that go along with it cause you to put so much of your life on hold, the hubby and I live in a city we don't love and with jobs we put up with, we do this because we love our Dr, we trust her and hope she will being us our baby. We are lucky enough to live close to our clinic and have bosses who are willing to allow us to move our schedules around for treatment, they are ok if I'm late because of ultrasounds or my third blood draw of the week, but sometimes I worry we will regret staying somewhere we are unhappy for a gamble. Let's face it IVF is a gamble, we've already failed four times whats to say this fifth time will be any different, or the fresh cycle after that. Its so scary to put your other dreams and life in general on hold for another dream that may never come true.
I'm very tired this week some is self inflicted and some work related, I always feel more emotional when I'm tired so next week I'm going to focus o getting plenty of sleep and also do some yoga to hopefully turn my mind off too.

I'll be back tomorrow or Sunday to share the good news.

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